What Else?

Mum going for endoscopy tomorrow to get some tissue sampling to determine the growth in her pancreas is cancerous or not*My lil Kitten died today*

What else to happen next?




 

Kesian.....

Today is the fifth day my mum was admitted to hospital. No I don't know what's her real disease until today. It sucks waiting. Much worst for the patient 17. Yes..today she is patient 17. Yesterday it was patient 24..or something. Apparently she's in high risk group so they transfered her into special care unit..Good. Only 4 beds inside the ward. Less crowd, a sink by the bed, and we have 2 plugs available for me to charge my BB and laptop. No really is not really really good news... as it marks her actual stage. Because of that someone has to be there all the time. I'm doing my turn now...graveyard shift. Its ok. At least no chaos with the visitors..nurses..doctors...new patients old patients..moving all around like in daytime.

Working life-I don't do overtime at all this week. It was really a small change that means alot-I managed to reach home before dark! How cool is that? It is..to me. :)

Forgive me for I have sinned- I spent RM450 buying 3 bags and a pair of cute patent blush pink heels at Charles & Keith during break today. Love-hate relationship with Fridays since it gave way too much time to indulge..and dig a big hole inside my tiny pocket! The word 'SALE' is really 'berhantu'. Another love-hate thing in my list. I wonder why? 

Was it because of the word-SALE? 

Was it because I have money to spent? 

Was it because the excitement of buying something?

Was it because Christmas sale always bring best stuffs on the display shelves and makes me swoon with delight?

Was it because I won't sleep in peace if I don't acquire them?

Was it because it just doesn't make sense to go to Midvalley all the way from Sg Besi and brave an hour-long jam due to everybody-received-their-paycheck -and-crazy-shopping-like-me crowd, almost none parking space, and bought nothing in the end? 

Or was it as a substitute for knowing that I won't be able to have my normal leisure outing during this weekend or after working hours next week , since I have to be in the hospital for my mum? 

Maybe its a harsh mixture of all those? 

Maybe :)  But I don't regret. 

Tomorrow, I'm getting my Coach bag posted by Yashma. Thanks girl!!!

Maybe, it's just a happy thing to do during this sad and stressful period.

Maybe, I just love to shop. Full stop!

ps. I hate needles. I hate medically inflicted pain. I must be healthy!

Time Kills Me

Today, I made a vow to become a housewife, for at least half of Sunday. Last night my MIL and SIL came and they left with Superman before lunch. I promised myself to finish folding the washed clothes. A BIG mountain of them. The worst of household chores for me which I always delay until end of the week. In one hour, I finished everything!

I waited and waited watching the TV,Tweeted,FB-ing. God, the clock ticked real slow!! Proven, I can't leave my fast phase, nerve-wrecking life. The feeling of waiting is worse.

On another story, my boss announced on Friday that he's leaving the project, and going for semi-retirement by end of the year. I was feeling shitty. Really shitty. The prospect of working with the future boss is really downing. I am not quite sure how I would handle him and even myself then. This is the first time I am having boss-changing experience, within the same post. Its not even a year. What's worst, he is the best boss to me personally, and to all those on the project team. I believed that I was in a really good track. I could actually see my short term future there. With this, I am not sure. Having a bad boss is worst than having a bad job, based on my own experience. However, I am trying to think and FEEL positive about this. Maybe he's not as bad as what was gossiped.

XXXXXXX

Superman just called, he fell from his bike. Gotta fetch him at his office. Brake faulty it seemed. Oh no!

Love At Its Best!

Let me tell you in bullet points:

1) I LOVE Long Weekend. Friday was Deepavali. So it became a public holiday. I spent most of my Friday around Shah Alam and Klang with my in laws.. For the first time, I went to Jusco Bukit Tinggi. Wahhh not bad! You see its one of Selangor's district that I am not familiar with. Always imagined it as a cowboy town!

2) I LOVE Saturday, always! i Twitted that it was my last day of singlehood last year. Yeah it was! What I remembered the most was chaos! I was not even feeling jittery or nervous about getting married the next day. So as pre-anniversary, Superman and me went to Pavilion with cik Mas, to have dinner at TGIF and watched Megamind. God, I hate Pavilion, no I hate the crowd. It was full of street punks!And at the same time it was MIFA runway show or something which brought fine people and fashionistas smack in the centre. Rojak atmosphere. Isn't Pavilion supposed to be a relaxed place? And there was a young girl who got slapped by her BF, maybe, and those street punks was like bees attracted to honey, followed all the way from the spot she got slapped to the mobile police van at the outside. Phew! What a scene!

And my mission to check out UNIQLO at the new mall, Fahrenheit opposite Pavilion was halted due to overcrowding. Guess what, at 7pm, they stopped the queue!

I noticed that more and more young people (I mean really young, school-going children or college students) wearing thousand ringgit bags and shopped at the high-street brands. You know, rm150 for a plain white t-shirt! with a small logo?! Its cool to see we Malaysians becoming more fashionable and people can afford buying all this expensive luxuries. But then, is it really appropriate for such young people to be indulging in such extravagance, with no income of their own? Of course you may say ,well, maybe their parents has bottomless bank accounts! But then, really, appropriate???? Well maybe because I was brought up in a full house of 5 children by not-bottomless-bank account-owners parents, this ringgit sense kept knocking my head.The most that I could get to shop was at Sogo or Jusco. In another hand I was living in Kajang, a real suburban-in-a-kampung-way, so I was a late bloomer in terms of branded shopping scene. Probably if I was born and bred in the heart of KL, I might become one of them(IF my parents could afford though!). It's a blessing in disguise for my parents pockets, based on my sense of shopping these days!hahaha! :) I wonder whether my future kids will be as privileged as these youngsters..hrmhhhh...

3) I LOVE Sunday only if it was 7.11.10! We were officially married for 1 year! Clap clap! Love you Superman. No more words can describe what I feel about you. Unspoken!

What did we have for the celebration? Let me try to remember. Hrmh..my mom cooked a big Tilapia for lunch which caused me to fell asleep afterwards. In the end we went out from home at 4pm. We drove to Superman's office to fetch his bike. We went back home separately. I had my hair cut,finally! And we had dinner at...get this, mamak! Har har har! Nothing really special. But having him still in my life is special enough.

4) I LOVE not having to work on Monday. After checking out Midvalley, I went to Pavilion alone while Superman went to his office. Since it was before lunch by then, I managed to check out UNIQLO. Frustrated. God, it must be the ad hype.Nothing really impressive to my eyes. Just decent. And weird. Who the hell wants to wear jackets in the humid weather of Malaysia, especially in the middle of KL city??! Could be of the Fall season. They are selling so much variety of fleece jackets. And they aren't really cheap for its Normal price. That's why people went crazy now that they have launching discounts! 

One thing I am not loving today is, Superman said he wanted me to slim down to size M! Like when we first met. Guess I was hot back then? Ha ha..gloat..gloat..please! Well I can't say no to this as I myself felt not hot nowadays. Hard to find nice clothes that actually fit me in the right places in most stores. I hate to admit. But I have surpassed the XL size for some cuts.Damn it. Damn who? Damn myself. Arghh!

Till I get myself slimmed down, I won't write another entry..Haha..Yeah right. We'll see ya?! Ciao.

Shopaholic Ain't Changing Yeah!

It's a lovely Saturday morning. I have acquired myself a new COACH bag without leaving the home and my pyjama. All thanks to Yashma!(oi..aku hampir makan megi oiii!). I decided not to visit her page anymore until my no-shopping mode is intact. Oh my god! Next month the sale will be much more crazier due to Christmas. Its time for skincare and makeup shopping. This is the time where all those special pallettes comes in. And..my stock's finishing. Good enough reason to splurge NECESSARILY!

Superman's watching his favourite movie-P.Ramlee's "Di Belakang Tabir". I kindof like this movie. The era is very cool. That's when the retro elements made the appearance. And man...they have A&W with dance floor! Superman's an avid fan of P.Ramlee, whereas  I had never watch any of his movies from start to end. Does this make me a bad Malaysian? Ha ha.

I am scratching my head on how to save more for the March trip. Girls only 1-week-adventure at a very foreign land. It's suppose to be an inexpensive trip. But being the Shopaholic I am, I need to have the extras. You know, just in case :) Since Superman's not joining, I am just scared to ask him to pitch in a little bit. Seems unfair too..But........darling..ehhehehe!:) Love you no matter what. Really:) 

The sun's rising but I haven't stared the laundry. Gotta go y'all!

Housewife Mode : ON!

Neverending Land

Taking 10 minutes break. It's 7:15pm. Am at office. Superman's outstation. No reason to go back so early. No one to hug and have chocolate shake with. Hrmh..

I have a good news! I have a new cat! Not at my own home though. Besides the fact that my condo is pet free zone, Superman won't allow any fury animals to come into the house. Jeez! When he will ever allow? So, this little kitten named Junior. She reminded me of Oren because she is orange in colour too! Very tiny. But, her eyes is so round and big, like Pussy in the Boots in Shrek movie. Actually my mom found her in front of the house on last Saturday afternoon. We couldn't locate the owner or the mama cat. God sent!! Message to Oren, wherever you are: "Were you the one who dropped us this cute little creature?? I'm missing you so much! I remember you every single day. Sometimes I still cried a little remembering the last days you were in my house. Where are you?"

It is really crazy at work these days. I felt like my tasks were neverending. And although I went back very late daily,seriously,daily, I still could not finish everything. I hate to go back home knowing this and that was not completed. I'll keep thinking about it throught the night. Sometimes, when I'm about to doze off, I remembered something, and the sleepy eyes became wide open. And the next day, new tasks came in like...woosh!!!Pap!Landed in my inbox tut tut tut! Overwhelming! I couldn't remember when was the last time I felt everything was really in order. Somehow, I think this really challenge my planning ability to the max! I took on extra project as the planner, which I love. My highlight of the year. An event which will happen in December. For about 200 people of my project team. Not that I am complaining. But well, I am only a human, with two hands,working 5 days a week, more than 8 hours daily, no assistant/secretary, because I AM a secretary. Got it? What the hell, I planned my own wedding aite?? At least 1200 people attended. But well, pressure is on since this is about W.O.R.K! Lots of people to prove my worth. Ha ha.. *naseb ko la Mariam, siape suruh rajin sangat??*

Okay, ladies and gentleman, back to work!

Issues..yes I HAVE!

Ok, my happy time was quite brief these days. And during those brief moments I was not in the mood of writing. I know I have promised you happy stories after the last entry.

But I don't know, my hands dance faster when I am not in a good mood. I guess you now already know that I am not in a good mood right now.

Depressed? Oh please....I hate the word.

At work, I am in the midst of something big. At least that's how I view it. I'm organizing a big event for the team. I'm so happy that my boss trusted me on this, but at the same time it gave so much headache and heartache. Its really hard to satisfy every one. And even if you don't mean to tick anyone, some souls just won't settle until I follow their wants. Or rather not becoming so good at what I do. Is it wrong not to feel content and challenge yourself to become a better person? Oh dear Allah, please guide me to a better path, give me strength to complete this with all the madness surrounding me. The saying "It's lonelier when you are at the top" seems so true.

*Is this me or my pre-menstrual talking?*


Other parts of my life, hrmh..alot of negative dramas too. From family to marriage.Jeez, I sound like a drama queen. But really friends, I wonder why it must came to me at this very moment? Can't they come one by one? Or sparingly? Its a wonder how I could sustain my sanity. Not having any drama in your life is truly a boring life. I don't want that too!

Right now, I just feel like diving deep down into my swimming pool. Imagining that I'm looking at corals and colourful fishes. I can't wait to get away, away at least for awhile.

*Reality check: I am now at my office. Taking 10 minutes break. Its 7:07pm. Not sure when the day will end.*

Ain't A Good Thing

There's so much going on in my life. But nothing is news worthy at the moment. If I write..its going to be a cocktail of sombre+annoying+sad+negative vibes. Which is not really good for you lovely readers.

And hell yeah I don't want to be remembered as

SENSITIVE Bitch!

Till I'm back to my cheery happy mode, take care peeps!

How to be Nice but Not Too Nice?

~Pat your friend's back and smile while telling her she's good for nothing~

I Hate Surprises Except If its A Nice 'It' Bag!

3:10am. I'm wide awake.Thanks to the rude shock in the middle of the night. 

I fucking hated it.

Full Stop!

I Will Not Be Perfect, but Close to It

Remember my debt repayment planning I mentioned not so long ago?

Its really hard to kick off the habit of buying stuffs impulsively. Yes I am an impulse buyer. Some stuffs that I bought ended up collecting dusts.

But I think I have learned enough.

And today, I found my mentor/motivation guru.Clck this link.
Luckily I have no kids and house to pay.

Hope it will help you too!

Am I Not Thankful Enough?

Is it wrong to say that you are bored with your life or work and you want something much more challenging or yearn better things in life? Does expressing your feelings mean you are not grateful?

I wonder?

Or should you choose between feeling content and not ask for more unless being given the 'rezeki' OR striving hard to create a better future using your sheer hard work and good brains+luck?

Really Inspired

HELLOOOOOO!!!!!! Selamat Hari Raya!! Do you notice anything different about me?

Blog hopping is a bliss. Peeking into other people's lives. I get lost absorbing the informations and their drama.. and for awhile its not all about me.

Its Malaysia Day today. I love it because its a public holiday, in the middle of the week. Tomorrow I took another day off my Annual Leave allocation. Damn, until April 2010, I only have 11 days balance.

Lately, I have started looking for a greener field out of the country. Just in case my contract is not renewed by early 2012. I get jealous+hopeful when I heard that some of my buddies are working abroad. And most of them are professionals like engineers and consultants. I wonder whether secretarial job will take me anywhere? Perhaps I have to take up a pro course with MAICSA and become a Company Secretary instead. Hell, that's a very serious job! Suit-up girl!

I know, nothing beats Malaysia coz I am so used to this beautiful country and its culture. But then again, I want to know. Satisfying my curiosity or rather adding up to my life experience by living and working in another country. Plus, currently working with lots of expats, it made me yearning of the perks they are receiving. Ha ha! Tonnes of money bebehhh! But Superman said if only me get a job abroad, he has no qualms to become a househusband. What?!So not sexy!No darling, I ain't coming back home to see my husband in apron...daily! No no no!

 Yes, now I have hair bangs. And I almost finished the whole jar of Raya cookies:)

These few days I was hit by cooking bug. I am not usually domestic. I prefer to stroll around shopping malls and dine outside. This is new. I was telling Superman to get me an oven. A baker standard oven, okay! Maybe I can start a baking business from home. Make money to invest!(Yeah right..)But I also want a bag for my wedding anniversary gift. A Coach bag. And Superman pretended that he didn't hear me. Grrr......

Sad story about Sosilawati case. You know..the murder of the cosmetic millionaire., What went wrong with these lunatics. Putting money over people's life?

I'm itching to go somewhere. My mother in law said I can't sit still. "Duduk-duduklah rumah" she said. The thing is, I need to get out to make myself tired. Or else I can't sleep at night. Darling, lets go out!

Arghhhh! What a Feeling!

1.Bloated
2.Lazy
3.Fat
4.Fat
5.Chubby
6.Fed up
7.Wants more cupcakes and ice cream.

Negative feelings.
Hate it so much!

Emotional nye aku hari ni!

First Time 'Meeting' my Father In Law

My hubby was orphaned quite a long time ago. We went to my FIL grave on the 2nd day of Raya morning after having a tahlil session.It was a weird feeling. I wonder if its my very own Papa's grave. This thing will happen to me some day. But I pray that it will not become a reality so soon. I am not ready. I need my Papa still.

Silently, I told Abah:
"Abah, thank you for bringing up your fine son. He completes me. Pray for our well being. So that one day, we will have a good son of our own."

And my heart melt when Superman said "Yazid balik dulu bah. Nanti Yazid datang lagi sembang-sembang, okay?" Every year my Superman cleaned up his Abah's grave before Hari Raya comes.


I looked around and saw some graves was not well taken care off. I wonder why so? We put up some leftover petals on those graves. Maybe their families are not around anymore to visit them. Ya Allah, please bless their souls too. I pray after I die, my families and relatives still remember me and visit my grave. I love white cala lilies.

My Blog: Us 3.jpg

Feeling delighted that 1st raya goes well.how about u?

This Hari Raya

Hi Darlings....

Found my friends sending Raya e-cards and zero real paper cards to me this year. Owh, you are very kind to environment but not to me..huk huk2! But its okay. The thoughts that matter. Thanks thanks!

Prior to the Hari Raya day which falls on 10.9.10, Friday, I would like to wish all of you Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri. Sorry if my words hurt you. Sorry for not being able to accomodate your feelings in my writings. Really if I ever hurt you physically, sorry. Sorry in every way. I'll do my best to be a better writer and person.

Drive safely. Eat a lot, and let us get fat together:) hhehe!

I Want to Be a BILLIONAIRE!so freaking bad!

Okay, am loving that song, Billionaire..

But to become one, I might as well follow these steps;(found on Yahoo)

TIPS from FRUGAL BILLIONAIRE

Jom!!

Flashback of Childhood

Sekamat gang rocks!

Yeah, had iftar session at home yesterday with my primary school friends. Lisha+fiance, Ainul+hubby,Erma, Liana and my dear Superman was seen "srottt srottt" their heart out eating the 'siput sedut', cooked by Ainul, ehh? Really?? Muahahhaha! Ina came earliest to cook vege dishes while I prep my FIRST ikan bakar+air asam+sambal belacan using recipes found on Google!I smelled belacan eau de toilette. Superman said its the best perfume ever! Wowwww!!So after thousand minutes, Ainul+hubby and Erma made their grand entrance with the great siput sedut masak lemak and Lisha+fiance was fashionably late. Luckily she managed to mix her Ribena fruit punch on time.Bravo bravo!

The best moments was the kacau-kutuk-cam whoring session while our man watched movies. It was like the old time. And all the 'lawak zaman sekolah' flew accross the room. Now my hubby knew I am "susu girl" all the way! Damn!Hahahah.What? you don't understand what its all about?Fret not. That's why it was called 'lawak zaman sekolah!" :)

We are all grown ups now. Single, engaged, married, studied, worked. We went to seperate paths. We have different life stories, struggles and achievments. But being with each other, those things doesn't really matter. Instead, it brought out the little child in us. I'm so happy and flattered that they enjoyed the little gathering at my home. Girls, lets swim together anytime! Hey, meh la duk kat condo aku! Ade lagi unit kosong sebelah rumah aku nii....  :D

Let the Pic Talks

Jeez my KM 900 sucks.I can't upload pictures as Blogger does not support the phone's browser to compose!What a downer. I need to install firefox.
Btw, I have, for the zillionth time vow to commit in clearing up my bad debts towards my financial independence. Time span 2 years! You won't caught me dead swiping the plastics(except for debit card).My new motto 'Credit Sucks!' and 'Cash it Out!' Yeah bebeh!

It's not a rocket science.But I refused to follow. Now, I will,dilligently!Pray for me, please!
Ps: many won't share their financial struggle. It's an embarrasment. It really does. But I hope from sharing this I will get insights from u my readers on how to tackle the issue, how to stay out of temptations and how to grow the money. Which is the best way for u?perhaps is good for me too..

Do I Have to Work?

It's 7:20am. 

Its Wednesday. Its a work day. But I am procrastinating getting ready.

Do I have to work Superman?

Do I?

Why can't I follow you to work? To wherever you go. Damn I sound so clingy. But I hate to sahur alone tomorrow morning. Maybe I just won't wake up. Easy peasy:)

Oh man, 5 days of holiday turned me into a lazy bum. Not a perfect housewife. I just don't  know how to be. I think my brain needs to be computerized like the Stepford housewives. Perfect..all perfect! And Superman can play his Xbox all day long without me complaining. "Oh Honey, please play more and more!" Clap clap clap!

Snapped into reality!  

Get ready now!!!

Car Type=Driver Attitude?

Do u like to be labeled?

But sometimes you've got to accept the fact that you are being labeled, like it or not.

Well this thing was in my mind for quite sometime but I just couldn't write it out since I was considering very hard whether it is appropriate.

Girls, some of us ladies were known to be attracted by certain things a guy is passionate about. One of it is their passion in cars. Or rather what they are driving. Some like sporty cars, some like luxury cars, and some won't really care. But I do care. I like luxury cars. But that was not what attracted me to Superman. His car at the time was not really luxe. Just decent:) 

I have a thing with modified cars. Especially those with the brand names of Proton Wira/Saga/Neo, Perodua Kancil, and old Civic. Its not a positive vibe. Time and time again they prove to be a brat on the streets. I tried hard to think that there must be some pure, calm and considerate souls driving these kind of cars. But I guess, with the modification that brings a greater vroom to the car, comes the attitude. You know, those idiotic/selfish/impatient drivers who can't wait to cross the street or speed up ahead of you although it was clear the road was not safe for such acts?? Besides not using their signals, some of them would even honk you if you are not driving fast enough! Hey you idiots, I was driving 110km/h already on coastal road lah! The cars in front of me was not cleared and the left lane was full of cars, and you kept on 'cucuk2' me! Wtf!Are you having a diarrhea or sth??!

If you, or your bf/hubby/daddy/bros/friends are in this category, I'm sorry if you don't like this entry. But really,these culprits MUST stop annoying other drivers! Be calm. Jiwa selamat! And turn your audio volume down while driving in residential area, especially at night. Drive in the right lane. Use your signal. And be considerate will ya?! 

Girls, if guys carrying this big ego while driving, do you think he will lower himself to accommodate your feelings? I wonder. Wow, that is quite a different issue. But really, if he's that bad on the road, can he really be a calm-no-attitude person off the wheels?

Its  almost Raya. Keep yourself safe on the roads lovelies. Think of your love ones. Think for your well-being too! XOXO!

Less Is Truly More!

Hey ya peeps!

Hey hey hey...ramadhan is going to end pretty soon. So on Thursday and Friday I went shopping some stuffs alone! Yup..alone! It's a bliss really. Despite the fact that I had to carry everything on my own, pay on my own, and no second opinions except for the very pleasing sales girls, I think I scored a lot. Found some gems which will last very2 long. I listened to what I really wanted AND not:D

But although I was alone, I felt like Superman was right beside me, preaching  me not to waste on unnecessary stuffs. But then, what is unnecessary?My vision was blurred seeing all those discount signs. Classic shopaholic syndrome. Ha ha!

So here was the deal I striked between me and Superman on the  Wednesday night when he gave me some money for Raya prep;

1)biscuit jars

2)biscuits to fill in the jars

3)1 pc baju kurung

4)dining and glass sets

But what was brought up to my condo(5 trips from my car!);

1)biscuit jars

2)NO biscuits!

3)2 pc baju kurung

4)dining and glass sets

5)3 shoes

6)3 bags

7)1 bangle and 1 pair of earings

8)raya undies:)(must find matching bras)

Yeahh...OTT!

It made me think.."what the hell just happened???!!!" Okay, okay, chilex Mariam! Just to justify my purchases, this year, I spend less on the item value. Like half..So, that's how I get more quantity..

Hey...that's what they meant by less is more...aite???!

Okay, this will last long. After all they are gorgeous too..especially the bags! Love love love!

TODAY Mission: Raya biscuits+'kerongsang'. Just that. Full stop!

Tried but Failed Miserably!

It's 6:30 am. My tummy's full with water+anlene+koay teaw kung fu of sahur. My eyes became dopey.

But I thought to spend more time with my hubby. But he's playing Xbox. What the heck. Tried to be supportive of his hobby. But my eyes wouldn't hold it anymore. Sorry man...I tried to get into the game but I just couldn't. My hands was not trained to push the controller buttons, hence, my Audi car just won't go at the right direction!Dush!

What Does It Mean??

Yesterday whilst at office and listening to Era station on my KM900 cell, an ustaz was giving this short talk. The content made me ponder my own motive. "Some people only feels hungry and thirsty after fasting the whole day." What else did I get from my own fasting? 90% hunger and thirst.10% yawning in the middle of the day + wishful thinking on Raya shoes+bag+baju kurung.That's it. 

I felt totally ashamed. Did I just realized that I blatantly doing this for the sake of fasting? Oh my my! My mom would have cried knowing her well-schooled daughter was not really absorbing the true hikmah of fasting. Its been awhile since I really follow the true path of Islam. I missed out alot on solat. I rarely read Quran. I don't wear hijab anymore. Oh god. What have I became? Not pointing fingers to who caused me this way. Just pointing it back to myself. I know. I'm an adult.  My parent did great sending to me to religious classes and teaching me good stuffs. I chose not to follow. But again, I believe, to do something good and holy shall start from the bottom of your heart. Forcing will only make me feel not sincere, thus, hypocrite. 

I always wonder why some of my friends who went to the same school, could sustain their religious appearance. Whereas I could not? Never wish to do this. But at one point in my life, I questioned myself. Did I do it because I fully embraced the teachings or because, I just afraid not to Allah, but to my parents or to other people like friends and family would say??Afraid to be different?Maybe I should start small ain't it? One step at a time. Again.Like a small child. Shameful. But for betterment?

Pondering  a bit deeper, maybe this is the reason my life isn't so great lately. Maybe I forgot to say thank you to Allah. Maybe I did not donate more than I should. So Allah took some things away. Some things that I thought I didn't have to worry until suddenly its not there anymore.Luckily, he didn't take all away.

I don't know why I felt so melancholic this Wednesday morning. Usually I could sleep well after my sahur. But today, the eyes just wouldn't shut. So I made peace and wrote these instead. Maybe that white coffee I had is doing its caffeine thingy?!

Sorry guys for posting this ridiculously sombre mode writings. I just need to let out. I'm not really good expressing myself verbally, but I know I am damn good in writing. 

Yesterday also, I felt the pang of missing something I love to do and always will, being crafty, designing something. You know, every time I felt the office works was overwhelming, I kept going back to my fav design blogs, for five minutes breaks. It gave me 'zing'!

Its 7:20am. Gotta get ready for work! Lucky me the office isn't so far away.:)

More Stories to Tell.As if I'm a Staar!

Hold your stinky breath!

Yeah..I know you have stinky breathe if you are fasting during this holy month of Ramadhan :) Most people do. But its okay, you will be rewarded with blessing by Allah. Something that I think I need alot these days. Forgive me Allah for I have sinned. For choosing to sleep than pray to you in the morning. For choosing to succumb myself to all things shopping without realizing I am wasting my precious money for my need to feel beautiful(and the kick from buying stuffs!). For not thinking that I should have donate more of my money to the needy than buying more and more of earings, shoes and bags. I couldn't help it. Help me Allah. Help me to control my weakness! But don't take away my love of cupcakes and chocolates! :)

Hi guys! Right now I am abusing the WiFi connection at my BIL house to reach all of you. Last five days was terribly busy. My boss was not around on Friday, but I couldn't even have time to glance through my Yahoomail. Sob sob....

Lately I'm starting to feel a lil bit of burnout. Just a little bit! I think I need a long holiday. I'm starting to think to take long holiday after each 3 month. Waaa...if only its that easy. For the 3 months, I only managed to take 1 day off twice. And one MC!

I wonder what it feels like to work abroad? I am really curious. Anybody care to share? I wish I am really brainy like engineers, docs and all those professionals where opportunities working abroad are abundant! For a secretary? Any chance?? I was told by a colleague that those mat salehs working in Malaysia, are mostly paid at least three times salary paid for locals. And they also get superb benefits. It made me think, are our professionals skills and knowledge are not competitve? Why don't we get the same amount of salary if not benefits? Unfair don't you think? Maybe that is why many Malaysians choose to work abroad?

Right now, I want a cupcake. Ciao!

Trying to figure out...

Cukupkah sepasang baju raya bersama 3 kasut baru?

Haven't bought the shoes yet.

But, due tovery limited budget and wayward nafsu, I've got to decide whether to buy shoes that I 'desperately' needed or buy more baju kurung to add up to my fast depleting fit-to-my-balooning-body baju kurung and also to add up to the 'feel' of Hari Raya?


Torn!

HELP ME DECIDE!!

Lovely Love

As I am writing this,I am sitting next to Superman's mom his eldest brother n wife in Tun Abdul Razak Hall @ UKM to witness him receiving his MBA scroll. I am a proud wife today.:) I still remember his struggles in monetary,time n effort to finish his study,to work n to marry me,all at the same time.Indeed he is my SUPERman! Thank you my love!

On a funny note; seeing the academicians all wearing the robes reminds me of Hogwarts.I think I spot Prof Dumbledore.I pinky swear!

Do You Have to Say Something Everytime I Say Something?

Well as I am writing this, my heart is felt with remorse. I feel dumbfounded of what unapealing effort to ruin people's day by someone whom I am trying hard to think nicely about her. Like bringing issues with no valid ground just so people can see that she has something 'brainy' to say and trying very hard to make other people's ideas seems less 'brainy' than hers. What is it actually these kind of people want? Did she lack the attention she badly wanted?Or did she enjoy making people look stupid? I continue to wonder.

Dear Allah, bless me with the right guidance to walk through this thin path to successful career and life. Ease my fear, my burden and my negative mind so that I can clearly see what is the right answer in every decision need to be made. Oh Allah, my merciful God, protect me from all the bad influence so that I won't create enemies along the way and the love I received from you, family, husband and friends remains intact.Oh Allah, bless me all the way!

What Binds Love?

Today, I am not wearing my wedding ring to the office. Superman, pardon me please for I have completely forgot to wear it in the rush this morning. I feel naked. I hate this feeling. Like I feel naked for not wearing lip gloss since I left it too!

But really why do I have to feel naked? Like I am not married to Superman without it? Like I don't love him anymore? Like I am a single lady reluctantly? No, I am still married to him, I don't love him less, and majority of people that knew me knows that my marriage is still intact. All checked. Still, this feeling is firmly looming around.

No matter what I am a strong independent women. Only that, maybe, love turn me into this 'jell-o'...:)

What's Next in Life...

Reflecting on my last entry...

I am not pregnant. Got the answer on the same day as Mr Red Flag gave me a visit. What did I feel? Relieved? Yeah. Happy? Not. I am not quite sure. And since then Superman has this weird dopey grin when he saw babies, babies pictures, babies this and babies that. Oh baby baby baby baby.......I wonder whether a pair of big round eyes, looking at us and crying out loud to have her milk sucked from my suddenly augmented breast will be everything in this sacred union of our hearts?

Happy to hear dear Diana is becoming the Mak Long of BVians as what was quoted by Yash in her blog. And last week, Norzie, my university friend found out she's 4 months pregnant too. And also few others, which I couldn't recall who got knocked up first. Seems like everybody is getting knocked up! Hey you knocked up readers, congratulations! Take care and do let me know when your lil tots arrived in this world ya!

And yes, I feel weird. I'm half way towards our anniversary. But I am still in awe of wedding dresses. Don't you think its weird too?When will I ever get over with this wedding obsession??!

On recent Friday, I accompanied Superman to Kuching for his work trip. Well , besides pitying him, bored to death in between flights and meetings, I jumped to every opportunity to see the world! FOC! Who doesn't want that?Lol! With careful planning at work, I sent out my leave application form, hoping my very best that it will get approved. At the end of Thursday, I was running here and there, making sure all tasks was completely done before I went jet setting. Unfortunately, there was still some left, which I had to ask my colleague to continue only after my lovely boss whisked me away, afraid that I was not able to catch my flight. Love you Boss! It feels like a second 'unplanned' honeymoon. Quite a spontaneous trip since we only relied to our trusted GPS tor  tell us where the tourist attraction in Kuching. Tell you what, don't trust your GPS completely as we ended up visiting a jogger path in front of a school and swimming pool next to PTPTL college!We had a major laugh when we arrived at these so called tourist attractions. After hours of  false destinations, we went to one of the shopping mall, sipping Coffee Bean ice blended. Superman finally searched through WiFi internet, and that was when we found some real touristy places. Cut it short, we became the last visitor at Semenggoh Orang Utan Rehabilitation Centre. Another false info, of which we were told it closes at 5pm, whereas we were politely whisked away by the officer at 4pm. Well, it was almost dark. Its a jungle out there. Real natural habitat where the orang utans was not caged, wildly bred, and we humans are the intruder. It was cool that we managed to snapped few pictures and some insightful briefing from the ranger. I went there when I was in secondary and it was not much different. But now they put up some noticeboard to caution people of the dos and don'ts at the area. There was also images of orang utans attacks which scares me good! 

Eh no, not trying to scare you or making you to think that they are monsters. No they are not. A real wild orang utan, are quite shy and they are hard to be seen. They are almost impossible to find nearby the viewing and feeding areas. However, those that had the history of being kept in captivity or getting human touch are the ones which we should watch out. Although they are used to us, but they still have unexpected behavior. In a funny note, they were named like human such as 'Delima' and 'Annuar'!

I want to upload some pics for you to see but my laptop suddenly couldn't read my memory card. Until then, smile always! Please smile back when someone smiles at you. You just make life so much better. So smile!:)

Was Sick, But I had Cupcakes!

I took my first MC yesterday due to fever and headache. But by the time the clock hit 1pm, I was quite fine already and yearning to go out.

Therefore, Superman so baik, took me to Pavilion and we watch Backup Plan. I really didn't know the sinopsis of the movie. Just that, been awhile watching JLo the Bootylicious Latino acting. Last time, she had that movie..er..what was the name? aiyahh...forgot! You know, the one with his ex-fiance. And it was a flop. I thaught this time around it should be better, aite? No! Such an uninteresting movie but scared me to death to give birth to my future child! Damn it, its horrible and I felt sick. In the movie they have this crazy group of single proud mommies. And in one scene was at a house where they gather to assist and give support to a member who was giving birth in the water. You know, without the docs what not. Purely natural. No surgery to open up the vagina at all! Wow! Arggg! Nightmare!

And this brought me to the topic, about me and Superman and the topic of getting pregnant and such.Well, I am late TWO DAYS! And Superman, gave me the LOOK already! This morning, he hugged me with a cheesy smile plastered on his face.And another hand was put on my flabby belly.And I was like...Oh god....!!Last night he suggested that if I still don't get my period by today, he's going to buy me the test kit. I freaked out. Yes ladies and gentleman, I freaked out! You do understand why am I like this do you? Remember this story? If I am really pregnant, I would be happy. But I will still freak out!

My recent dream doesn't help too. In it, I already have a tiny baby. Not sure of the gender. I went out to shop something and it went on and  on until night time. And then I went back home and I forgot to feed my baby! Don't ask howcome I could leave my child at home. I don't even remember whether I have a nanny or not. Oh MY GOD!!

Now, can I be a good mommy???

What Did You Missed About Me ...recently?

Do you miss me??

I do..

I mean those times when I was freaking full of ideas and couldn't wait to write and tell all the world. I don't know myself these days. I stare and stare at the screen to write something really exciting. Guess what, I lied that I completely absorbed with my work. There are some good 10 minutes or so sometimes that I really2 wanted to write something, but not even a word moved my finger.Frustrated. I went reading other people blogs instead.

So whatever happened to me?Okay, just the important ones:)

First of all, I had my most anticipated day in June. Yeah people, my belated birthday and housewarming party which happened on 26.6.2010. Although my body was strained at the end of the day, running like mad woman, making sure everything from food to deco was in order, I couldn't have asked more. It was perfect to us although it has some imperfections. Like, I forgot to pump up the baloons(actually I misplaced them and couldn't find it at all, untill after I cleared up the house!). And almost everything except the deco was not done from my home. Lucky me, my mom could cook to cater for that day. I woke up early that day, just to buy flowers at Pasar Kajang. The theme was Orange+Yellow. After I brought them home, I realized, I don't even have a vase to put them in! So they ended up in a pail. What a waste!And Wiz managed to bake the cakes and muffettes on time, of which I had to pick it up myself since she was terribly busy with her other orders and Superman had to stay at the house to receive the guests(What???!! I had to pickup my own birthday cake???!Darn!Superman, next year I ain't going to slave myself for the cake again!:( ) This year, I planned my own party, to celebrate my eldest sister,SIL and nephew birthdays as well as the housewarming party. It seemed perfect! The mixture of our friends and family seemed like a tiny wedding to me.

My humble set up, due to the lack of baloons!

Crazily nice cakes!

Birthday boy+girls

My oldest friend. Since kindie!!Now she has a lil daughter, Ms Aina. 

But, the parents seems more kiddie than their own kid eh??

The party pack

The party people:) Azea, can get enough of the food! haha!

Just some of the flowers that I managed to squeeze in a lil bottle.Nice?

On Thursday the next week, I had to attend PAC, the final stage before the government decides whether you are fit to be working with them or not. Everybody was telling me to go. First of all, its a hard chance to come by. And if, only if, I succeed, I'll become one of the most highly respected government servant.With all the perks its a waste not to grab. Guess what, I couldn't make myself go!

And on last Friday, i planned a surprise birthday party for my dear boss. Complete with a big birthday cake made by Wiz! Everybody seemed like enjoying to the max with the food, candies and deco. It was a very hush hush thing. Imagine, about 100 of us, we were all crammed up in the 'huge' meeting room, in dark, while waiting for the Boss to enter. I was waiting outside. When he arrived I said something like "Boss, I need something from you. Lets discuss inside here" while I pushed open the door. And he saw his banner, and he said "Shits!" And, in a split second, his face was filled with bubble spray! What a relieved when it was all done. Again, I was lucky that mommy could cater on that day and I had some of my colleagues to help out.

I learned from all the parties that I have planned, its all about timing and budgeting. And always always have plan B. I wonder whether I should venture into party planning business shall the day came when I no longer enjoy office works. This adds up to my list : makeup, hantaran deco, baking, wall arts. What's next?

I guess that's all folks. I am still in office. I want to go back. There's still few work stuffs stacked up on the table. But I don't care. Today, I am bloody tired. Yesterday, I stayed up until 9pm, having Dominos pizza dinner at my cubicle while my eyes was on the screen and one hand typing(oops, kantoi I ate with my left hand!erk!)

So adios! Merci!

Its July feeling

Notice my new template?
I don't know about this.
Personally I messed up the look real bad.

Green is never my colour. I think I'm messed up inside out. I am feeling numb.


But maybe its great...is it??

I am BAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDD!

Thousand apologies my dear readers for I have sinned.

I abandoned you without slightest news.

I am a bad blogger for the past two weeks,

and I wish to

end it

NOW!

PLEASE FORGIVE ME.

Love ya!

MY GLORIOUS 27TH YEARS OF LIVING

I am 27 y/o today.

I am taking 10 minutes of my neverending work,  to commemorate MJ's death my Birthday.

How do I feel?

Excited.

Elated.

Happy.

Sunshine.

And

Sad Too.

Superman's outstation. Will come back only tomorrow morning.

How's that for a birthday treat?Huk huk!

Can't wait for my little party tomorrow.

I still feel bad for not being able to invite some more of close friends.

Yes, I have lots.

Am having difficult time to categorize. I hate being categorized by anyone.

So yeah, I DID NOT really categorize.

Thanks to those who have wished me in Facebook, SMS and even called me

to sing Happy Birthday song.

Owh I'm so touched!

I feel loved!

~Oh u know who u who you are:)~

Merci!

Note: Superman, come back with lots of chocolates please!!!!

I need my sugar fix. And only mahal-mahal Pretty ones will do.XOXO.

Towards Happy Times!

The preparation should start now. Squeezing all the nano seconds I have everyday towards the party. I imagine fancy party, but I don't think I have enough resource in terms of time and money.

Where should I start?

What the hell. Do the list-lah!

Saviour!

Thanks to Wiz again and again for agreeing

to bake the birthday cakes!

Thanks sangat2!

XOXO!

It's Not Right!

I have a story or rather a thought, which I have summed up since yesterday. But couldn't find time to rant due to work overload.

Something stupid happened while I was busy and tense yesterday morning. It brought me to angry, sad and dumbfounded emotions but also, an awakening. Remember I told you about my housewarming cum birthday party to be held soon. Yes dear, very soon, next week. Saturday to be exact.(Again, I am terribly sorry for not being able to make an open invitation to all of you, lovely readers). So I ordered two birthday cakes(well, we are going to celebrate my eldest sis, sis in law and lil nephew as well as mine) from a baker in Bangi. I hate to name her. I am still pissed. And I am not a heartless moron who loves to downgrade people and crush someone else's business, especially when she is from my own native. But then, girl, if you read this, please upgrade your customer service and revoke your unfair "akad"/rules.

I am a very "vocal" person when I am upset. Well, only in writing. In person, I tend to hold my tongue unvoluntarily. Its really hard to translate my negative emotions verbally there and then.

I made a deposit which was 1/3 from the whole amount about a month before. So I thought, that should be enough and I will pay the rest COD or just before fetching it from her home.Last week she emailed a reminder. So I said of course I will pay before the day. You see, I didn't realize there was  an "akad jual beli" / terms in her email before as I didn't read properly. It says I have to pay full by 20/5/2010, which was more than one month away from the event date! My excitement clouded my judgement. Classic case, huh? Okay, that could be my fault for overlooking but unfortunately, aggreeing with whatever it was, when I paid the deposit.

Rationally thinking, I wouldn't even agree to such condition imposed by her OR anyone else, selling food/service like this. Do you agree with this?;-
The product she is selling is in food category. Usually when it comes to food/service industry, its normal that the vendors ask us to pay a certain percentage of the amount and pay the rest only AFTER you experience the service or see/check the food. Think when you hire a caterer for your wedding/events, would you pay the whole amount before the event? When you eat at McDonalds, don't you check your order before you pay? And at spa or hotels, would you pay before you are being lavished with their skills and hospitality? Would you? And my argument is, why would you pay the whole amount of a cake when you can't even see your can't-wait-to-click-your-camera-and-eat-all you-want-but-sayang-coz-it's-very-enxpensive cake yet??

I became much more pissed with her when she said this to me:

"i taknak cakap byk sebab u tak faham apa itu akad jual beli"
"I don't want to say more because you don't understand what is T&C"

Shits, what more worse can I get kan? I am the customer and she could say something downgrading like that to me???!! So I did some research. I wonder whether I am what she said. And whether she really is "celik ilmu" more than me. This is what I got;

"Dalam Islam, sesuatu yang ingin dijual itu perlu wujud dan ada dalam pemilikan penjual ketika akad dilakukan.
Jika barang yang diakad tidak wujud ketika akad, ia boleh mewujudkan unsur ketidaktentuan mengenai kemampuan penjual menyerahkan aset itu kepada pembeli.
Dalam perundangan Islam, kontrak jual beli boleh menjadi akad fasid jika penjual gagal menyerahkan barang yang diakad ketika akad dibuat."-Muhammad Hisyam Mohamad, Felo Pusat Ekonomi dan Kajian Sosial, Institut Kefahaman Islam Malaysia. the link is here
(For non-muslim readers, FYI, "akad jual beli" is a T&C of purchase between vendor and buyer. This quote explains that in Islamic law, the product must be available when you do the agreement. If not, it will bring uncertainty element fo the vendor to deliver the products to buyer. In the Islamic law/Syariah, it can be anuled if the vendor could not hand it to buyer when the agreement was made. However in the service/food agreement, the vendor should not impose full payment before the product being delivered. Don't you think so??)

So, am I still  tak faham by now? Please....

I am not trying to prove whether I am better than her, but I really hate it when someone can blatantly downgrade me. Watch your mouth sister!Tak sayang business ke?Word of mouth is much more powerful than you can imagine you, know!.But nah...I'd rather focus on more positive and rewarding things than continue with this bad feelings. Now that I said it out loud, peace yo!


Note: Do we have to agree with unfair T&C imposed by sellers? The ball is in your court. I am no supporter, that's for sure.

Exam Passed..now PAC???

Life's less interesting today.

But I just knew that I am required to go for Program Assessment Centre(PAC) for a government post I was applying to before I join the Company. It is not easy to get into the list since applicants MUST attend a written exam. A really really long and draining exam, which I took in Putrajaya. Its wierd that they require me to wear sports attire on the registration day. I don't remember applying for any sports related positions?????So where do this requirement came from?

Now I am really torn. I enjoy working here now. Nice boss. Good learning opportunity and career advancement. The diversity and benefits are tremendous! But then again, for stability, government has always been a good choice. And their benefits are what gets jobseekers in Malaysia talking too. The thing is I worry of the low wage. I heard that the starting salary is half from what I am getting now. Still I am terribly curious about the assessment. I think I will attend to experience it. Whether I pass or not doesn't matter, right? Majority failed. This is the only time in my life I don't really care if I fail! :D

Sometimes...

I am a lonely wife these days...

No Superman is not abandoning me. He left me with love(and money,lol!). He left me for work. So I have to be strong and cherish the fact that he's doing it for us. Suddenly our condo feels so empty.The echo of water drippings became louder than ever. When he was around I sometimes feel I need my ME time. Now that he's away, it feels wierd. Nobody to fight the remote control with. Nobody to tickle. Nobody to hug before I fell asleep. I couldn't hear his loud snore. Very wierd emptiness. Last night was the first night I slept there alone:(

I miss you SUPERMAN!!

Maybe this is a good time for swimming sessions after work? Or getting sweaty in the office gym?There's no rush to go back home, except for my favourite TV series:)

Okay I don't want this somber mood of mine gets in the way of my duty. Focus Mariam!!

Constipated

I ate alot, but I didn't eat proper food lately. I mean fiber rich foods. Therefore I am suffering from my self made constipation. My tummy is feeling hard. Damn.

Less caffeine which is water sucker, more fruits and vege. Yeah yeah yeahh...

My friend is getting married. Two in fact, during this weekend. I was torn which one to attend. Finally, I made up my mind. I will attend Diana's at Malacca, for her solemnization. And Ainul's for her reception, which I will be giving a speech. Fair eh? Happy Kawin Kawin dearies! Goodbyeeeeee singlehood!

Since I attended Safety Day event last Tuesday, my mind became quite alert about safety issues. I used to mock and detest everytime Papa said, "Wear your seatbelts, don't wait until you got flagged down by the traffic police!." We children always thought Papa being Mr Goody Two Shoes about it, since police were usually busy manning the traffic they didn't even realized we were not wearing seat belts! But thinking back, he was working as Safety and Health Officer. It became his second nature to be very alert about all these. Not just over reacting. Working in this O&G industry, I realized, they are SUPER concerned about health and safety issues. A rare occurence in my previous offices. Now that I had a rude awakening from the long video presentation "Remember Charlie"-about a guy who got burned 45% of his body. He said, a mistake he made for not following the safety rules at work, became a lifetime regret. One stupid mistake! All the while before that, he always thought "It's not going to happen to me" everytime he was being reminded in daily briefings. So now, I don't feel easy not wearing the seatbelts while driving!( Skema la pulak aku!)

Okay guys, worry not. Just be aware in everything you do. As the saying says, "No human is perfect." But all that we can do is, be as perfect as possible. So that we will not say "If only..." once something bad happens. Regrets will only dampen your spirit.Take care!

Need an Earphone to Listen to Lady Gaga Singing!PRONTO!

I guess my eardrums are loving me these days, yeah!

The only time i'm listening to somethings else than the sound of keyboard typing and phone ringings, is outside working hours. I think I need to buy an earphone ASAP. I keep on forgetting everytime I went to the mall. Or can I request it along with my other birthday wishlist?

Hell yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!

27th BIRTHDAY WISHLIST!

Oh now you know how old I am. Geez, I'm not they type who's scared with the age!Its just numbers to me:)

-New Laptop-

-Shopping Vouchers!(Jusco, La Senza, Topshop, etc)-

-Earphone(P.S PINK colour pls!)-

-A wristwatch-

-A green coloured handbag-

-A black coloured dinner bag/clutch-

-Bangles-

-Rings-

-Earrings-

-Necklace-

-A pretty red/chocolate colour belt-

-Makeup palettes(lip pallettes,eyeshadow pallettes,etc)-

-Scarves-

-Pretty tops-

-Unique items..what?!!-

See, its easy to find presents for girls aite? What's more, I am no Paris Hilton.

Any price will do. As long as you are sincere:)

P.S Will I ever get any of it? Oh you cutie pie, lavish me will ya?

What If Someone is YOU?

I spent my Sunday, communicating with the owner of a FB profile that impersonates my BIL and sis. I am not going to deliberate the situation and the reasons.But then, its intriguing to think that someone would actually take time, energy and emotions to do all that.

I knew few other souls who unfortunately got the same situations. People would actually think its them, friends will spill their secrets, invite them to events and such.Sometimes, sexy or rather private pictures was put up. I think if you are a rational and discrete person in real life, why would you put up such pictures for the world to see right?I pray to Allah, that I would never get the same fate. I hope I didn't pissed anyone like that!And if I do, I seek your forgiveness. Spare me from all the trouble to sue you, crazy cyber criminals!

I also think, this criminals actually have Attention Deficit Disorder. Its like they want to be heard, but they don't want to blatantly tell you that. Or maybe some other forms of psychological terms. Well I ain't a psychatrist. I don't have the credibility to diagnose them. But all I know is, their souls were disturbed, and they have problems channeling their anger and frustrations or yearnings. May Allah bless them and makes the world a better place to live in. Amin...

Annoyed?No?!Yippie!!

As you can see I changed to a new picture for top bar.

I can't stand being reminded of my lovely Oren everytime I view the previous pic.

But then, do you feel sick to find I am staring and smiling sweetly at you?

He he he....

Give me a break. It's my birthday month!!!
Yes, I am a Cancerian!
Guess, when I was born?
Morning?Noon?Afternoon or Night?
Should I start a giveaway to reward you readers?
Eyh??!...I'm the birthday girl lah!

Still Low??Schweeet!!

I hate the scent of hospital.You know that sanitized scent. Usually made of Dettol vapour. This morning, when I walked into my office lobby, it was all around me.Felt a little bit dizzy, suffocated. We had another case of H1N1 this week. So nurses was stationed at every floor entrance. All must be declared fit before entering the work area, including the visitors. Disease..GO AWAY!

To support health awareness among staffs, the Company organized a health check, from weight to cholestrol level in blood was checked. The most fit person will be given a special prize tomorrow. I'm a confirmed failure. In a positive note, I have a reason to stuffed myself with sweet goodness! My blood sugar level was low, even after I had my breakfast and lunch and three big glass of sweetened drinks. I wonder why? But then, CUPCAKES, CHOCOLATES, CAKES, DESSERT....here I come! yeay!

Suddenly Monday..Owh!!

My weekend flew by without me noticing. We were very busy, day and night, helping out Superman's BIL's wedding. The most anticipated event of the year AND it was filled with lots of interesting stories. A mix of emotions super packed! It made me remember my own November wedding. It brought me cry happy and sad tears all the way. I guess, it might be so wrong if all that you experience is just easiness and happiness prior your big day. All this ups and downs are what make you remember it forever. All that we should do is to try manage it as proper as possible. To all my future bride friends and readers, perfection is not everything as what seems perfect to you might not be perfect to others. But, traditions and protocols must always be your top priority. I don't know about you, but to me, a wedding without a proper guidance in these areas are best done within just your immediate family and friends. Although a marriage starts with you and your partner, its everyone involved in the process are what makes a wedding, a wedding. Just my two cents. And last but not least...SMILE!:)

At this moment, my mind is picturing myself swimming in the pool. My body needs a rest badly. I miss my FB. Owh..the momentary brain shut from work matters, or rather the whole day! is super nice at this moment. Once upon a time, I was on FB the whole day at work. By the time the clock hits 2pm, I wished I could go shopping! These days, I don't need shopping in the middle of the day anymore. Just FB will be enough. Ha ha!

One Month Milestone

No no no definitely not about pregnancy!

Today marks my first month in this lovely huge office.

I am terribly happy. I got my first salary yesterday. And now, after quite sometime, I could really enjoy what I was paid for as now I only pay quarter of the toll and petrol from what it was since January. Parking allowance is a very welcome joy! I bought two pairs of work shoes at Vincci last night. Nothing fancy. Just to reward myself. Most of this month budget is to buy stuffs for my condo. Turns out we have alot of things but not so much of important and decorative ones.Ikea can you please give awesome discounts just for us??

If only..:D

What Is It With Baby Crying??!

Okay, I know I am married for 6 month plus already.
What I am going to say is very much sensitive to all who has been asking(TQVM..i appreciate that..really!). But it also a bit depressing and annoying at the same time when I was asked, repeatedly, especially from the very same persons;

"Any good news?"

OR

"When am I going to hear your baby crying?"

OR

"Is everything okay?"

OR

"Is that a baby bump on you?"

AND the worst;

"How's your love life?"

Ladies and gentleman, here I am, not so proud but quite adamantly, announcing that me and Superman is planning our first offspring. However, it might not happen so quickly. Reason being is that we are still enjoying our "married couple without babies or even pregnancy" life and strategesing our economy as well as parenting livelihood before we enter the phase. However, without hesitation, we will welcome the bundle of joy shall the almighty Allah put the trust on us if he/she comes before our honeymoon phase ends.

Truth be told, Superman would want one anytime soon. But I am not ready. I have so much on my plate to focus now. And I belief, my future son/daughter should have all my of energy and heart devoted for them even before day one. Currently, I barely able to be a completely devoted wife. Let alone a mother. I am terribly lucky that my husband is really understanding. You wouldn't want me to be an ignorant mother OR wife would you, Superman?

So please my dear lovelies, though I appreciate your kind concern, those questions, really makes me want to bang my head on the wall. Enough okay. And with due respect, if it really happens, I would tell all the world. Nobody will be spared. Till then, chill yo!

Ps. I am a proud owner of a flabby tummy.

As Expected

Tuesday, the works are piling up. I hardly can breathe, let alone YM-ing. Luckily there's no access to FB here in the office.. or else, I'll get much more frustrated. Feeling disconnected to the rest of the world already.

But well, this is something expected right from the beginning. And it is way better to come to work with a clear cut purpose than waiting for work to land on your desk unexpectedly. More so yearning for some tasks to be given to you. -reminiscing the old working chapter-

Finally, I had to make an unbecoming decision late afternoon yesterday. After discussing with Azea, who was kind enough to accept Kontawt back into her cosy home so that he can grow healthily with his mom by his side, I sent him at night. With heavy heart, I spent the last moments with him while darling Superman drove. He was screaming again and again the whole journey. But, by the time he stepped inside Azea's house, he went quiete, inspecting the familiar surrounding and running happily to his siblings. Superman was in awe. I on the other hand, stoned up my heart, not letting the emotion came through. I left the newly bought cage with Ofey, Azea's sister, so that I won't be reminded of him so much. Goodbye Kontawt! May the lovely beings around you gives all the warmth and care you need.Sob sob...

I Wish I Can Eat Cupcake Underwater

Since I had my first cupcake, it became a public love affair. No day I would say no to cupcake.

And last Friday I finally had my first taste of Wiz's cupcake.

Terribly delicious!I'm officially an addict!

On Saturday, I had early morning call. Its the day! Dressed in shorts and shirts, we sweat ourselves out, rearranging stuffs and all sorts of other things. The movers was kind enough to tolerate our orders from morning till late afternoon. We made two trips from Wangsa Maju-Sg Long-Setiawangsa-Sg Long since we had so many things to pick up! I slept like a baby and hate to wake up the next morning.

But, we still have tonnes of  tasks to be completed. We had to do it ASAP since we have to get our place live in ready by Thursday.We are receiving our first sleepover guests! After mopping and cleaning all the kitchenwares my legs and back felt really strained. I went to the living room only to see there's a MOUNTAIN of boxes to be unpacked. Oh hell! Monday is a work day already, how can we finish them perfectly on time?? The next thing I know, the sun was already making its way to shine in the other part of the world.

I promised my dear friend Azea, to pick up her kitten for adoption by 8pm. I was pretty excited. Spent a good RM100 to buy his cage, milk, cat biscuit and sand(thinking that I only managed to buy an RM80 shoe this month:( ). To cut the story short, I arrived home, with the lil kitten(just 1 month old). I named him Kontawt(acronym of Shorty) due to his very short tail. He's all black, I could only see his eyes piercing from inside the dark cage. My heart fluttered with excitement and wary. He's so scared sitting alone without his mom and siblings, meowing at the top of his lungs! My sister who could see me and hear the deafening voice from inside the house was already contorting her face. The moment I opened the sliding door, she said "You better leave it outside!." I could sense a rejection. That follows with, "This house kan with baby...bla bla..flu, allergy, noisy,..bla bla bla...cannot eat on his own..so small...bla bla bla...who's going to feed him when you are at office?Who's going to clean his poop and urine?Send him back until he's bigger and stronger and not screaming!". My heart broke to trillion pieces.

I have to say, what she said makes sense. I thought after all the years with cats in the house, a new cat would be great after Oren left. I could feel the emptiness, a void without this fury pet animal. But the fact that he's too young and easily agitated didn't jive pleasantly. Mommy said, to adopt, it must be at least 3 or 4 months old. He still needs his mom's milk. Or else, he'll get sick easily like getting diarrhea caused by the powdered milk. I am at wits end. I want the cat so much! However, I hate to trouble my family, as well as Azea who's been taking care of him for the last month. And how can everyone sleep peacefully with him meowing non-stop? Kontawt didn't even want to drink from the container. I had to syringe fed him this morning. That makes me more convinced that he can't take care of himself yet. Oh Kontawt!!!!!!